memoirs of a nobody's boy

Bring it on 2012!

2012-01-01T00:00:00.002+08:00

Cheers for 2012! wish for more blessings, more happiness! peace & love! money money money!!!

Christmas 2011

2011-12-25T00:34:00.000+08:00

A season to be merry, a day to be happy! Sharing it with friends and Family and thanking for all the Blessings! Happy Birthday to the One Almighty. :)

year 2011

2011-12-24T19:42:00.001+08:00

Before I will have my last posts this year, I would like to have a recap and share all the great things that happened for year 2011.

I know I am very much blessed this year, and there are so many things that I have to be thankful about.

First of course is my 25^th Silver Birthday, a very expected event but yet an unexpected one. I never thought it would be much more grandiose as my first birthday. (lol) My family has prepared everything and even my siblings especially my brother who sponsored a layered cake for me. It was one of my happiest moments, where I have my family and my closest friends with me on my special day. It was a wonderful time to celebrate another phase of life without even the thought that I am getting another year older.

Second is my urge and frustrations to finally have a job after almost a year and a half being a bum. Fortunately after so many applications, waiting, interviews, false hopes and wasted time, I am thankful to be part of this company. And I would truly attest that yes, prayers are answered and in hardship there is always a reward in the end. I know, what I have been through was really though, the process and everything, but as I said everything was worth it.

Other than those are also special events, festivities and happenings towards the end of the year.

There goes the silver 25^th birthday celebrations among my closest friends,

Arch. Eulams, Julien & Matet's Birthday

The nightly laag and hangouts, booze and music tripping!

The colorful festival and celebration of the annual Sandugo Mardi Gras which me and my friends joined in.

The comeback of one of our ka barkadas and his wedding, which is actually the first wedding I have attended from a close friend since high school.

And lastly which I truly claimed as a blessings, to be a first godparent to my very first godchild. Meet baby Enzo!

pinky promise: a new start

2011-03-25T23:32:00.002+08:00

Hello,

I haven't been into blogging for moths now, and to be honest I missed writing real nothings. A lot of things happened lately that I wanted to share, but found no time to write it down.

Before, blogging is the outlet of my emotions, feelings and opinions of things, and still it is till now. It's my simple way of escape. I can write everything I want, express everything I feel, I can say whatever my emotions wants to. For those who don't know, I got other blog shared on this account but I decided to kept it private. Only few people know about it, it was the first blog I wrote since I started blogging four years ago.

You might as well ask, why I made another one. It's because I wanted to start a new. Something that I won't keep from people, something that I can share and shout to the whole world. As the saying goes, forget your past so you can move forward to your future, but carry it on and serve them as your guide as to what you have learned from it.

As much as I want to update this blog from now and then, I know it will need a lot more of my time. But this is what I'll pinky promise, I'll keep it posted every time. Just hope you'll bare everything I write and post on this blog for I'm entitled the freedom to write. Hope I can share with you good times, memories, experiences, happenings,events, and tell you stories,literary works, arts, photos and etc.

enjoy and we may all learn from these things. :)

im not a failure

2011-01-13T19:11:00.000+08:00

survey

2010-10-10T20:46:00.001+08:00

Two moths ago, aside from being an official bum, ans still being one till now. I find myself to another fun and worthwhile experience. From being a midnight zombie encoders as part-time job, together with my friends, we decided to go for an adventure as field interviewers.

we got in just for fun, and nothing more. at first it was really tough to find respondents to interview and have them answered a 32 pages questionnaires, much worst were still to edit it after. And to take note I have 77 questionnaires accomplished. Patience and perseverance is all we need. Its not easy to be at the middle of the day, under the heat of the sun, and changing weather just to find for a qualified respondent. But in the end, its your wit that is more important!

Its all about land tenures, agricultural cropping, residential land, and some sort of the like. What made it fun, is of course the company of people were working with, aside from old friends, we met new ones. One thing also is the travel we had, like long trips to different town in our province. places we never been before. and most of all the experience. walking on rice fields, forest, and so may more are the memories i will never forget.

its not easy, but we have fun. It was hard but we enjoyed. all hardship are rewarded with its equal price.

SHOUT!

2010-10-08T22:53:00.002+08:00

Wow, can't believe I'll be blogging again, it's been a while since the last post. Who would have thought, ayt? Well I guess writing would be the best therapy and most likely an interesting hobby. I don't know why but I just find myself in front of the PC, opening blogspot and here I am now blogging. Maybe I just need some kinda of an outlet and this is the only thing I can think of as the best outlet. I am free to what I want to say and write. About how I feel. And right at this very moment I just wanted to SHOUT with out anybody hearing it!

Honestly I'm not feeling okay. Its always been this way.. lol. I don't know how i feel. I am sad -maybe, angry? - perhaps, frustrated? YES! I just really don't understand. Things never turned out good to me in the past few days. Not as what I have expected, I never expect but maybe not as what I hope for. I am hurt, and I feel totally frustrated.

I have been thinking again lots of things as I usually do, things that happened that I'm pissed. I'm loosing my nerve on it, my temper, I easily got annoyed and irritated. this really makes me sick and it really sucks! I know it just me. :(

I'm not pissed for no reason. the fact that I know, but I just don't know how to deal with it now. Well, enough of this cruel dramas. anyways sorry if my return to blogging has to be like this. I should have wrote some more interesting stuffs but, it makes me feel fine. Anyways, hope I could write and blog often. I missed it.

see you soon. :)

resting memories...

2010-04-06T00:41:00.000+08:00

I have been waiting for something to happen in these past few days. Waiting for something to come. something to occur. I don't know if it's a who or what but I'm not really expecting any in particular. All I know was I am waiting for something that I don't know.

Days comes fast but nothing happens. And I guess its now time to get up, and start walking.

There are lots of memories stored right inside my brain. Good and even the bad ones. The good thing is I seldom do remember now the bad ones, and cherished more on the good ones. There are also particular memories, that I don't want to be lost. Memories with those people or person who are/is special to me. And its ironic that sometimes good memories with the person, can somehow be a bad one. It somehow could hurt or make me sad.

These are memories that keeps me from holding back. Keeps me to hope for. To fight. But I guess its about time now to forget some of these memories, or to keep some of them on the chest box and just have sometime to look back on it in the future. It's about time, to move. I don't want to be stuck on something uncertain. Life is moving. I don't want to dwell on it anymore, thinking of those things that could have and should not have been done. It doesn't matter anymore now.

I haven't really think much of the things lately.Just enjoying the things and with the people I'm around with. I felt now that I'm okay. Being used to with the things that I thought are supposed to be. Maybe this is what is being destined, or what fates has allowed. Feels like the usual thing about a couple of years ago. And maybe this have been a good thing for me.

I'm beginning to live a new life. A new chapter. There always be a right time for everything. Heaven knows what I want, what I need. When it comes it comes and heaven only knows when is the right time. So I am resting everything for now and starting a new. =)

101 small pleasure

2010-03-25T14:55:00.002+08:00

Its true that doing this simple things can give us pleasure... Glad I do some.. and its worth a share!

101 small pleasures you can enjoy every day

by Sarah McColl, Shine staff, on Fri Mar 12, 2010 6:04am PST

Earlier in the week when we talked about the habits of happy people, many of you mentioned the small pleasures you enjoy that are worth more than anything money can buy, like walking on the beach and flying paper airplanes with your children. Since one of the key tenets of happiness is being able to savor small pleasures, here's a list of 101 delights that are worth enjoying today (not all in one day, though!). Let's try to come up with 101 more in the comments!

coloring (yes, grown-ups can do it, too)
crisp cotton sheets
soft skin
old family recipes
the first daffodils of spring
sleeping in
an exercise endorphin high
window boxes
a perfect cup of coffee
a genuine compliment (giving or receiving)
the way babies smell
a handwritten letter
waking up in a good mood...for no real reason
singing in the shower
finding a couple forgotten dollars in your pocket
doing something nice for your neighbor
a home cooked meal
laughing
movie theater popcorn
playing hookey
a bubble bath
swimming
an afternoon nap
street musicians
your favorite song
saying thank you
helping someone in need
old fashioned photo booths
fresh whipped cream
inspiring blogs
a glass of wine
rainy afternoons
the funny things kids say
a novel you can get lost in
finding the perfect piece of clothing...on sale
clean laundry
the wind in your hair
treating the person behind you at the drive-thru
sharing an umbrella
the smell of lavender
a long walk that clears your head
a bear hug
The Beatles
smiling at a stranger
eating with chopsticks (Chinese food optional)
butterflies
staying in your pj's all day
singing along to the radio and knowing all the words
fresh herbs
ordering in pizza
happy endings...even if they're fictional
flying a kite
puppies
root beer floats
holding open the door...
...or having someone hold the door for you
fountain soda
white, fluffy towels
sunshine
spending an afternoon at a museum
really great advice
green lights all the way home
the sound of rain hitting the windows
sitting in a booth
holding hands
a great hair day with no effort
building a fort with your kids
when someone falls asleep with their head on your shoulder
fireflies
the perfect taco
geraniums on a windowsill
slow dancing
the smell of fresh-baked bread
cheesy, uplifting musicals
great stories
the smell of gasoline
the cold side of the pillow
love letters
old friends...
...new friends
a pull-through parking space
a baguette -- crisp on the outside, airy on the inside
when a dog licks your hand
sitting at the counter at an old-fashioned diner
using your favorite dishes
reading your child a bedtime story
Girl Scout Cookies
flossing
kissing someone you love
the smell of onions and garlic cooking
hot chocolate
jumping in puddles
old photographs
birds hopping on the sidewalk
Ella Fitzgerald
a spoonful of peanut butter straight from the jar
your softest t-shirt
a new magazine in the mail
fireplaces
having exact change
bacon and pancakes cooking on Saturday morning

24 on 23rd

2010-03-23T23:30:00.003+08:00

just another year have passed and yet another year to face...

again, before the last minute.. will love to give myself a cheer... though things for now were really not doing well I guess, but still I'm thanking for the blessings in the past 23 happy years..and for the 24 years of existence, I just hope and pray for good health, great opportunities and a happy life..

more people to meet, more places to travel, more time to explore...more love, more happiness, more inspiration.. and a lot more...

HAPPY 24th BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! :)

the bigger picture

2010-03-07T22:26:00.001+08:00

okay here is another post from today. It's all up to heaven now... I do believe in it :)

God wants me to know

2010-03-05T23:33:00.004+08:00

It is so funny that I have been thinking lot of things and been praying in heaven to seek for answers, but its here on Facebook I could somehow find the answers to some questions. It's on this "God wants you to know" application which I tried for the first time after being intrigue of seeing it on my friends page what God has for them to say. And now I wanted to share also what God wants me to know, which I believe really is true and really has sense.

Maybe it is already enough. Sometimes we just don't know if its worth it. I guess already have done my part. Maybe not really my whole best, but at least I tried. Now its God's turn, for he knows whats worth and best for me.

home boy

2010-02-17T11:34:00.002+08:00

I just miss this kind of life. I miss my bed, sleeping comfortably at night. Waking up late in the morning, tuning on to the local FM station or listening my favorite music on the CD player. Having breakfast at 10, sitting on the couch watching over TV shows, napping the whole afternoon, surfing down the net, chatting, photo editing, and lastly blogging!

Or perhaps the other way around, waking up early, cooking breakfast, have some little exercise, take a short nap, have an early bath and back to the routine of eating breakfast at 10.

I seldom go out in the afternoon but usually went out at night.Hanging out with friends, have coffee, boozing, hopping on acoustic bars or simply having chit-chats till midnight drops specially on weekends. Or having a trip on the country side and bumming on beaches. We do more of this way back then and so I am missing this a lot.

Hope I could do more of this laid back experience now that I’m officially a bum.

6 Personality traits to admire and acquire

2010-02-12T01:58:00.000+08:00

by Brett Blumenthal - Sheer Balance, on Thu Jan 28, 2010 6:49am PST

I’ve written numerous articles and posts on difficult people, personalities and relationships: Everything from Manipulative Marys to Bullies in the workplace to people who break boundaries to toxic personalities. Let’s face it: In life, we come across all kinds! As humans, we often focus on those who are negative or toxic leaving it difficult to appreciate those who are positive and healthy. Seeking out individuals with healthy, positive traits, however, may do a lot of good. The more we can surround ourselves with those who are positive and healthy, the more we may model those positive behaviors.
If you really think about it, once in awhile you come across a person who knocks you off your socks…legitimately. Maybe they have a fantastic outlook on life, even during difficult times. Maybe they are really humble, although they are extremely gifted. Maybe they make you feel special. All of these are good.
Below, I've listed some of the traits I admire most in people. Although I could probably list a dozen characteristics, I thought I’d list those that seem to be the rarest or most difficult to find.

Selflessness: In a world where many people don’t have the time or the interest in others, selflessness is a quality that seems to be less and less common. People can be selfless in the time they give, the ability to listen, their level of patience and the love that they give. Those who are giving and generous in nature have the power to make others feel loved, appreciated and special. While those who are self-absorbed tend to do the exact opposite.
Tolerance: Those people who are tolerant make us feel comfortable with who we are and special as individuals. All of us are different, and many of us have quirks and idiosyncrasies. After all, these differences make the world go round. Having the ability to accept people for who they are and not expect them to be who we want them to be is important in life, happiness and in the health of our relationships.
Genuineness: Having the ability to be real, authentic and honest is unique in a world where we put so much emphasis on the superficial. Feeling comfortable in one’s skin and being true to one’s self is one of the most beautiful traits one can possess. To have a REAL relationship with someone requires honesty…it requires hearing and giving input or feedback that may not always be popular…it means having the strength to tell it like it is and to not be afraid to face the consequences for doing so…it means loving people for who they really are…deep down…and not for what they appear to be.
Sensitivity: So often we are focused on what is important to ourselves that we can forget about those around us. Those who are sensitive are often thoughtful, appreciative and loving, in a way that makes you feel understood, valued and respected. Often, sensitive people are also self-aware, making them mindful of how they impact others with what they do and say.
Integrity: Call me cynical, but I think this characteristic is especially difficult to find. In a time when people will do things that are underhanded to make an extra buck (Bernie Madoff…can you hear me?), expose their personal lives to the public so they can be famous (balloon boy’s dad and any other reality TV mongers) and do what feels good in the moment without necessarily thinking of the consequences (Tiger Woods), integrity is a characteristic that is especially unique today.
Humility: Whether someone is super-smart, extremely talented or drop-dead gorgeous, there is something extra special about them if they don’t come across as though they know it all the time. Humility in those that possess extraordinary traits make others feel special too.

Oh boy the list could go on! What characteristics do you admire in others? Are there any that you want to cultivate?
Originally published on Sheer Balance

to delete?

2010-01-09T03:20:00.001+08:00

the last stop!

2010-01-07T10:03:00.000+08:00

After a number of attempts, I finally tender my resignation today It has been a long plan. Having been in the service of the company for two years is fairly enough. I just feel it’s time to move on and look for other opportunities and challenges.

I might have said imperfections regarding my maiden company, just like any other but I have nothing more to say for in a way it has provided me monetary support and personal growth. It was on its assistance I first gain my professional development. I will surely miss some of my co-employees who have been a part of my daily undertakings at work.

Now am bearing the risk of unemployment but I'm better relieved in this decision to back on the life I used to and TO ENJOY LIFE EVEN AT THE SIMPLEST REASON FOR BLISS...

Yet I know, it’s still uncertain what lies ahead of me now and I guess there are lots of doors of opportunities out there waiting to be knocked. But I just have to move on this time....

Goodbye 2009

2009-12-31T07:50:00.007+08:00

Today is Dec 31, 2009. The last day of the year. As of the moment it is 16 hours, 998 minutes, 59903seconds before the clock hits new year’s eve.

At this very point, it is time to think of all that happened in this year. Good or bad. We should be thankful of all the blessings we received. Let’s all leave behind all the negative things like hurts, doubts and fear. And start anew. Let's have a year of LOVE, PEACE & HAPPINESS.

Let me thank all the people who have been a part of my 2009. To my families and friends for the wonderful memories that will forever stay in my heart. To those special people whom shared special moments – Thank You!

This year has been a great year. And I am wishing more for the next year to come.

Thank you and Goodbye 2009. Hello and welcome 2010! God bless us all!

And I'll begin to live my life without you

2009-12-30T07:42:00.001+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFZ1Vdk6TLs

Close your eyes and say goodnight
And hold me 'til the morning light
When the Sun comes shining through
I'll kiss you
One last time
And I'll begin to live my life without you

Wish the I could make you stay
But I know I have no power to persuade
The heart to do what it must do
So kiss me
One last time
And tell me how to live my life without you

'Cause I love you
Whitout an ending
'Cause I need you
To be my everything
Tell me the meaning of a life without you with me

When the night falls
I'll still be standing
'Cause you'll always
Be right here in my heart
And in my deepest memories
I won't ever have to be
Whitout you

Love is like a work of art
Once you feel it and you hold it in your heart
You know forever that's true
So kiss me
For always
Even if I live my life without you

2009-12-26T03:40:00.000+08:00

I might not have greeted everyone a Merry Christmas. Let me take this opportunity to greet and say thank you to everyone who have shared their love during this season.

This Christmas has been a special day with me. Celebrating it newly this time in my second home and family here in Cebu. Though I was away from my family in the Christmas eve, I still reached my love and greetings for them and joined them later that day. What is important was that I was able to celebrate Christmas with all the special people I love.

I am also happy to have spent it differently. Trying also Christmas in different place. What matters is that we let Christ once again enter our hearts this wonderful season of Christmas. Spending our time with our love ones and special someone. Our families and friends

an echo of a year

2009-12-23T04:22:00.007+08:00

December 23 - two more days before Christmas. Time runs so fast that in the next few weeks another fruitful year is going to end. And a little more days, things will turn on differently.

As I was trying to have a flashback this year, I thought myself of the wonderful things happened to me. There are lots of things that I don’t want to end and let go, and there are those I want to bury and be washed away as the new year turns next. This year was full of love, happiness, and celebration along with a little sadness and hurts. This year I shared myself as a person.

It was in the field of art that I have found love. A Love that has inspired me. It’s this year I had shared much happiness. Where it gives me more hope, it is where I learned to fight, to protect, to appreciate, to be confident, to listen and to care. And it’s also this year I have felt pain and in every hurts it makes me strong to stand still. It has taught me humility, to accept, to believe, to trust and to understand. Every ups and downs has given me lessons. I learned a lot from many things as well as learning from my own self to become a better person.

This year was a year for encounters. People, places and events. There were memories worth to be cherished and remembered. Those that need not to be dwell and let just time heals. Those happy times that made me smile and laugh. Those days of fun, adventures and travels that I have enjoyed. There are also those special moments shared that I will always kept in my heart. A picture that will forever stay.

But life is not for me to hold. Simply everything is borrowed. No matter how I hold things tight, if it is not me who would let go it will just eventually slip-away. And the only things that will remain are the memories of the things we learn to love. I only just wish for a better life for the upcoming year, wishing for more travels and adventures, better opportunities for a promising career and for the safety and health for myself and all my love ones. I am praying for more happiness and blessings. And lastly to still be in love.. (whot!)

worn-out

2009-12-10T04:10:00.004+08:00

Things didn’t turn out so well this past few days and weeks especially with regards to my heart issues. I felt sad on how things have suddenly changed. On how feelings and emotions have been affected. I felt sad, tired and hurt. What I am afraid of is if a heart get hurt over and over again, time comes it will also become tired and more worse it will become numb. It’s when we started not to believe, forget some things and learn not to feel anything.

sad, tired, hurt, confused, wounded & bleeding

In everything there is always a “buts’ and if’s”. It doesn’t mean everything is lost. For true love is always there present no matter what, maybe trying to rest for a while. And if only things were just done to make things better. As of now, I let this heart have its mourning till it heals. Waiting for the time. In the end, it’s the choice that matters. For if given a chance, I will always love the same person I have truly loved.

too little of a time

2009-11-23T23:05:00.001+08:00

As of the moment, I am still in state of uncertainty. I’m thinking over and over again to a decision I have to make that will take effect few weeks from now. I am not quite sure if what I am to do is good, but somehow a part of me say that there could be something better that waits. I really don’t know what lies ahead. Maybe this is what I want and this has been a long time plan, but knowing me, I easily change my mind and that I don’t want to happen right now. I don’t want to think that I am just carried away by the present situation, but as I can see I have strong-will to make it possible this time.

I have considered lot of factors in this decision, and whatever the outcome of this could truly and totally affect my life in the coming days, weeks or perhaps months to come. A little bit worried and little bit confident.

I know that after all this; there could be a lot of opportunities waiting. But how about the opportunity I’ll miss. This is all about leaving. One part of life I hate. This means again detachment away from things I am used to, to people whom I used to get along. Another adjustment that I have to carry out. But the thing is, there are certain things and people that I don’t want to leave behind. I wish I had more time, to spend with them but I know I am running out. But I only got a month. I still want to talk with them, there are things I still want to do with them. I just want to spend more time, more memories. They are the reason why I don’t want to be away especially to that one person, that very special person, the very reason I really wanted to stay and that makes it hard for me.

Exploring the Island of Fire

2009-10-31T08:01:00.042+08:00

Two weeks ago, I’ve been invited by a friend to another island escapade. As what I promised to myself that before this year will end, I should have visited other places, at least one but just have made two already. It was long dream for me to visit the island, and yet there where so many plans before I had finally stepped into it. Now I have just explored the island of Camiguin.

Known to be the island of fire, Camiguin has numerous volcanoes which one is still considered active, the Mt. Hibok-Hibok. It was also dotted with both hot and cold springs which one should not miss when staying into the island. Boasting their natural beauty, Camiguinon also shows there artistry through incorporating different cultures to their own.

Approximately our three hour trip was quite tiring after having a rush for the limited time schedules on the ferry boat. The big rough waves of the southern part made it more fun yet giving us a little ache. It took us again half an hour before we finally nestled ourselves in the house of our friend. The planning and preparation for the escapade made us more excited, ready for our first stop.

At the depths of Mt. Hibok-Hibok lies the famous hot spring ESPERANZA ARDENT HOT SPRING heated at 40 degree Celsius. Our long ride towards the spring was relieved by seeing the ambiance of the place. Our laid-back bodies were relaxed as we submerged ourselves on the warm flowing stream just like on a hot spa having a good therapy. It was all worth for a night.

Sto. Niño Cold Spring is another spring of cold and fresh water that has a sandy bottom. Its coldness can cool a bottle of soft drinks in just a few minutes. There is always been a freezing and icy feeling every time you plunged in to the water. Precautions are given to those who does not know much to swim and those who are not used to extreme coldness.

An early bath at the BURA SODA WATER SWIMMING POOL in a rainy morning is cool and refreshing. The Soda spring is said to be the only pool of soda water in the whole country. You can feel the taste of a little soda at the flowing water beside the pool. It also gives a scenic view of Mt. Hibok-Hibok on the background.

The volcanic eruption of Mt. Vulcan in 1871 had washed out s ome Spanish settlement established in 1697 including the GUI-OB CHURCH. The ruins left on the Old Spanish Church were only the top most part of its adobe walls, belfry and convent.

The Sunken Cemetery lies 20 feet underwater. Tombstones were already been covered by corals. A huge cross is found in the middle of the sea that was made in 1982 to mark the cemetery which sunk during the 1871 volcanic eruption. There are rented bancas in the area that will take you closer to the cross having also a view with the high mountains on the background.

The Walkway is like any other station of the cross up in the mountains. Where each station is located as the way becomes steep and high. This is also to show the sacrifice and penitence of people during holy week. As one reaches the top, the overview on the other part of the island awaits seeing also the cross in the sunken cemetery below.

The Lanzones Festival, is a thanksgiving celebration every October for the blessings the Camiguinons have received and for the abundance of the sweet-soured yellowish tropical fruit lanzones which also grows in the province.

There are still a lot of places that I haven’t been due to limited time, and it is giving me reason to visit the place once more, just like the other cold and hot springs, exquisite falls, the Tanguines man-made Lagoon and the magnificent white sandbar of the White Island.

encounters

2009-09-10T03:47:00.002+08:00

The photo below was taken last Sunday when I and Ghuki unexpectedly met some of our high school classmates at Dunkin that evening. It was nice seeing them again; well I have been seeing most of them every time I went home aside from Vic whom I saw last couple of years ago and Jethro who just passed by after church and who rarely hangout. We had a great time talking and reminiscing our high school life. Went together for dinner and had some sweet sundaes after.

Before that as I was strolling down by the mall, another thing that makes the night full of surprises was when I met again those people whom I least expect to see. People who I don’t want see anymore and people who I thought I’ll never see again. People from my past whom I learned to forget and people who I longed to see. Funny it seems that after a year or more we meet again in those busy corners unexpectedly. On how the reaction on their faces looks like and thinking how would I respond to them. Fate simply leads us on our way, and everything goes casually. I am happy to know how there life now is. There is nothing more or less to think of. =)

Thanks also to matet, hedz, luke and gsar for the dinner last Monday and for having a great time in the KTV. Nice songs guys have it added on my playlist. =)

farewell for now....

2009-08-23T17:32:00.001+08:00

There are things in life that doesn't last forever, but still worth to hope for. Not everything is meant to be but everything is worth a try. In this time, when we were hurt or still hurting we wanted to be a far. Trying have distance and give ourselves time to heal. Things doesn't really end there, it might just be for the moment, but of course to burn a bridges is a choice. No matter how hurting it is, I don't hold on any grudges or anger for pain is part of it. It was the good memories now that I want to keep, those happy times shared for somehow good friendship evolves among others. What was done can't be undone, there were hurtful words we say that we don't really want to. Lies or truth doesn't have to do with it now because in this experience a lot of lessons have been taught. It doesn't matter if we learn from it or not, as longs as we have to look at it as our guides.

I don't know what tomorrow have after this, still I wanted things to be okay maybe not like before but just the way things started. We all have our own regrets, but not of having someone whom we shared our life with but to the things we wished we should have done and things we wished we didn't do. We all have our expectations, but we just have to hope for it than to expect. No one is perfect as we all say, I too have my own lapses, my own imperfections. I gave but maybe it was not enough, I received but maybe I was asking much. I loved and get hurt, and in a way I was loved and have hurt others too.

Sometimes we say it hurts because we came in second, but it is how we spent the moments with one another that matters. Only time can tell and time will find a way to heal a broken heart and hopefully it comes in the right time.

Thank you for the love and care. For coming into my life unexpected. I don't want to see this as goodbye but just like to say - farewell for now.

'Til I See you Again...

2009-07-21T23:58:00.001+08:00

I am whispering your name
I am telling to the wind
Your love will brought me here
'Til I see you again
I am opening the door
I will let this moment in
Your love can find me here
'Til i see you again....

Happy Birthday

2009-03-23T23:41:00.005+08:00

Before the last minute ends, after all I would like to greet myself a

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

wishing the best of everything...

thanks to all the greetings!

cheers! :)

first week of March

2009-03-07T03:05:00.005+08:00

We are already in the month of March nearing to the day of my deadline (not the other meaning… blimey! ) and I haven’t accomplished yet with those goals I made. Maybe I just lack the motivation to pursue as what I promised or shall I say the determination to do things. Nowadays I consider myself as lazy dog and now I felt frustrated that not even one of it have been realized. I got few more days and I just hope and wish I could meet just even one before the red date.

On the other hand, it’s been again another tiring week for haven’t done anything. Well I think I did something, aside from, daydreaming, rearranging stuff in my room, sleeping but still having not enough, reading different featured news on the net both current and entertainment which I found entertaining and interesting, I also read the novels of two known best-selling authors Paulo Coelho and J.K Rowling (thanks that I just finished Harry Potter in just a week)but then again I find the rest of the days mind-numbing. What made it worse is that I’ve been suffering from a severe migraine for almost a couple of days or three. I suspected that the cause might be the books I read thick as thumb one after the other or the forced sleep I usually do to get rid of my insomnia or maybe my eyes just needs repair or simply because I feel bored that my mind can’t think of any but to give me a damn bad headache . Well I pray its nothing serious, like brain damage or sarcoma. (scary!) But after these damn-dumb days I got a positive outlook that this weekend or next week might be a fun and exciting one, I’m not saying that I didn’t enjoy reading those books because I do, I think it got me a good room for those boring times. I am just hoping and being optimistic that the next few more weeks will also be more productive .

Anyways, I just want to share something I read, it has nothing to do with everything else but could somehow help us a little bit of etiquette. I got this from Yahoo! Food Foxy Festivities by Rita Mauceri and Elycia Rubin.

The Worst (And Most Common) Etiquette Mistakes
Posted Mon, Mar 02, 2009, 10:53 am PST

Party Poopers When you receive an invitation to a dinner or party--whether by Evite, voicemail, or casual email--RESPOND. Yeah, that’s what that little “RSVP” thing means. Everyone knows it, yet it’s amazing how many don’t respond. Even for weddings! Planning a party or event requires a lot of work, so do the host a simple favor and let them know if you're coming or not.

Nickel & Dimin’ How annoying is it when you go to dinner with four or more people, the check finally arrives, and one of your meal companions begins to divvy up the check down to the last penny? Sure, we get that Sally had a shrimp salad, and Janet had two iced teas, while Beth only had water, and you ordered a slice of peach pie (a la mode, which is extra). The point is, if you go out to dinner with a group, be prepared to split the bill more or less evenly. If there's an outstanding cost differential, fine, estimate it and be done with it. The person who spends twenty minutes dividing the bill to the dime comes off as a cheapskate –- and kills the festive mood.

The Line-Up Lines are a fact of life. At the post office, the supermarket, just about everywhere these days. For starters, moaners who huff and gripe about standing in a line of three people for all of five minutes are tops on our list. Get over yourself -- if you don’t have a few minutes to wait to buy that loaf of bread, then pick it up another time. Another thing: Don’t show your impatience by creeping up so close to the person in front of you that they can feel your breath. Crowding those around you will not get you to the front any faster, so give them some space. Finally, cutting in line or trying to ignore the fact that there IS a line –- stop it! Everyone’s time is valuable.

The ME Show It’s great to hear all the crazy, wacky, wonderful things happening in the lives of others. Jobs, engagements, breakups, boyfriends, puppies, pregnancies, vacations — very good stuff, all of it. But once you’ve listened to a friend, family member, or colleague spout about their own fabulous life for an hour (or two), it’s normal to expect them to ask, “So, what’s going on with you?” Those who blab on about themselves while you listen intently, then don’t ask a thing about you in return are just plain rude.

Mobile Madness As much as we love the modern age, there are days when we long to go to a coffee shop, movie theatre, bookstore, or post office and not hear some teen queen dishing to her friend about last night's hot date with Todd or eavesdrop (unwillingly) on a screaming family feud. Mobile phones are essential, but please, people, pleeeeeeease, use a little restraint on the when's, what's, and where's. We're happy that Todd is "totally built" but we're going to have to start walking around town and slapping people with "TMI" tickets (yes, too much information).

Smokes Everyone has a right to smoke in public, but be conscious of whose face your smoke is blowing into. Are there kids nearby? And we just might kick the butt of the next person we see throwing their burning butt on the ground without putting it out. Really, find an ashtray or trashcan where you can extinguish and dispose of it properly -- that thing is garbage, not decoration for our streets and sidewalks.

The Pee & Flee Public bathrooms get used by everyone -- yup, they're public! So, making a mess of the toilet seat, and then prancing out without bothering to wipe it up -- not cool. Leaving a mess for the next visitor is completely unacceptable (and disgustingly unsanitary, of course). Take 10 seconds to rip off a piece of toilet paper, toilet seat cover, or a paper towel, and do your due diligence!

Belly Baring Men, women -- anyone who's passed puberty, everyone who isn't lounging poolside or oceanside -- resist the urge to bare those bellies. They may be beautiful, Buddha-like, jolly, but sometimes they can be flabby, hairy, and not ripe for public consumption. If you're jogging, fellas, t-shirts or tanks won't hurt your workout, so throw one on. Gals, midriff fashions are never really on our "Do" list, and that goes double if your age doesn't contain the word "teen." There are plenty of ways for all of us to flaunt what we got without sharing our tum-tums with the world.

Spitting This gets especially yucky when it's one of those enormous globs that looks like it could be alive. Some people (males, in particular) think it's kind of a cool-guy thing to do. We're here to tell you that no one wants to see you hock a big gooey one out of your car, onto the sidewalk, or anywhere else for that matter. Try a tissue.

Honking Problem People who honk too often, too unnecessarily, or just to express their emotions are on our list of Most Etiquette Challenged. If you're trying to warn someone about a collision or problem, fine, otherwise it's not that serious. Give it a rest!

Well I guess, most of you would agree as much as I do!
Ian Mark

POP Icons & Boyce Avenue Concert

2009-02-17T03:34:00.005+08:00

Valentine’s day is being celebrated mostly by lovers that is what most people thought but who say it is just for them when in fact the hearts day can be celebrated by everybody whether your single, dating or taken. I also got my own way of celebrating the valentine’s day. I don’t want to rush with other people in restaurants and movie theaters, so I take for a sure seat.

Last February 14, was the live concert of the POP ICONS. It was a good timing for those who look for a date on the valentine’s day. Together with two of my friends, we waited and line ourselves for almost three hours for the show. For those who don’t know the POP Icons, they are considered as the five hottest names of the country composed of singer-actors and heartthrobs Piolo Pascual, Sam Milby, Erik Santos, Mark Bautista and Christian Bautista. The whole crowd inside the concert hall at the Waterfront Cebu Pacific Ballroom were serenade by love songs and pop music, a lot of loud screams echoed every time they performed and sing their songs. Everyone was really having fun with the POP Icons performances. The all did a great job on it specially Mark and Eric who graced the audience with their punch lines. It was a surprise to see moms and dads with their families watching the concert and even those who are in a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship and most of all the oldies. I think it was one of the best valentine date you can have on the valentine’s day. The long wait as well as the price is worth it after seeing and enjoying the show.

Also last Thursday February 12, I also joined myself with the crowd at the SM Cebu Northwing to watch the free concert of International acoustic sensation - the BOYCE AVENUE. (I am a fan of their music)

Ian Mark

sober before shift

2009-02-12T07:52:00.001+08:00

Nine hours ago, I felt like not working on my shift for a simple and unreasonable reason – I am drunk! (uhm, not really drunk but sober maybe). I’ve been getting in and out on the restroom for a while to puke and wash my face so I won’t look like I’m in a mess. I also got a bad headache and I felt like there something inside my stomach. I just remember I didn’t get any for my tummy before the booze for I had my early dinner, the reason may be why I got this unexplainable hangover. A friend invited me for a drink before my graveyard shift and I didn’t expect it would be just the two of us in one-on-one table session. I thought two bottle of Red Horse Grande won’t kick me off, because normally it won’t, but when were about to be done with the second bottle I felt numb and dizzy, maybe because it’s been a month now since I haven’t been drinking(lame excuse) and we don’t have much talk, so it’s really a pure and plain drink. But everything is okay now, of course I am responsible for myself, I make sure that I am on my nerves the time I get into the office. I don’t want to get my work affected and if ever I can’t handle why come in, right? I care about my job, I care about who?! Anyways, if you want a proof that I am not really that intoxicated maybe writing this entry and posting it would be a good one. And I’ll never drink again before going to work unless I still have an hour to recuperate before the last minute. :)

Ian Mark

Nonon & Lester

2009-02-11T04:11:00.001+08:00

It is again another sad day last weekend for another close friend has to leave. Just last December, days before new year, Lester a friend of ours left and try his luck in Bahrain. And now it is another one’s turn to fly out of the country. Nonon flew last Sunday evening to UK. Both of them are two of my close buds, well, they all are (Bubble Gang and Midnight Rangers). All of us have same common friends sharing same common interests. And for sure we will be missing them both. Lester who used to be my board mate and roommate and Nonon who was frustrated to be my girlfriend (just kidding!), and who’s one of my partners specially for a heart-to-heart talk has their own stories connected to me, No one knows when they’ll be coming back, but they will always have a home to return. All I wish for them is the best in their life. And one question always remains “who will be the next?”

To Nonon and Lester, see you soon. Someday will see each other again, if not here then maybe there! Miss you guys! :)

Ian Mark

Sinulog '09 - Pit Señor!

2009-01-21T01:01:00.022+08:00

Hello! Last January 17 -18 one of the grandest festivals in the Philippines was celebrated here in Cebu City – the SINULOG festival. It is a celebration to honor the solemnity of the child Jesus Senior Sto. Niño as well as the first baptism of Christianity in the country. People across the nation, even abroad flew to Cebu to join the celebration. This was my second time to participate in the Sinulog festival and I truly say that this is the biggest celebration I ever been and being a part of it was a privileged and was a great experience.

Saturday afternoon I joined myself together with my friends in the carozza of the image of the Sr. Sto Niño. Some main streets were closed that causes a jam of traffic and I am one of those caught by the bumper to bumper scenario. About 1.2 million people marched in the procession and gathered along the sidewalks. A huge crowd was even waiting inside the Basilica to take a glimpse on the image of the child Jesus. Devotees waved their hands , cheered, sing praises and pray as the carozza passes by them. Many believed that the Holy child give miracles and heal. What touched me most was to see fellow Filipinos and people from different races showing devotion to the Niño and were truly devoted to our faith. The head-to-tail procession lasted for more than 3 hours and pontifical mass was held inside the Senior Sto. Niño Basilica.

Sunday morning after hearing an early mass I headed at the Gen. Maxilom Ave to witness another highlight of the celebration - the grand Sinulog mardigras. The streets were filled again with crowd watching the different contingent from the towns of Cebu and nearby provinces. They all graced the street with lively sound and beat, dancing for the Sto. Niño. Lucky enough I had a perfect place for a closer view on the street dancing and also the weather was quite gloomy, so no worry for sunburns but I pray not for the rain. After awhile I had my lunch at ate Quennie’s house together with my company colleagues for the provincewide fiesta. Late afternoon we went down again to the streets to watch and join the colorful parade with celebrities and famous personalities, taking some pictures, having fun and enjoying the moment. There are about 44 delegates competing for the mardigras and still they danced till dusk.

In the evening, the night was liven up with fireworks and bands. The city was jammed packed with party people as they groove along the streets of Mango Ave., Fuente Circle and Jones Ave. For the Cebuanos this is really a big celebration and even to most Filipinos. A celebration for both solemnity and festivity. I was happy to be one of those who witnessed and to be part of the celebration. And so I am hoping to see you in the next Sinulog Festival.

Pit Señor!
Ian Mark

(see more Sinulog pics at my friendster account and not to mention I was drunk for those two nights.. boozing till I drop!)

Sinulog Festival - the opening

2009-01-10T08:35:00.002+08:00

As I was strolling down along Fuente Osmeña circle last night here in Cebu City, I bumped into a crowd by the sidewalk. It just reminds me that the Sinulog Festival is already near. Yes, the mother of all festivals in the Philippines is to be celebrated in a week from now. The streets were illuminated with lights and echoed with lively sound. Backdrops from different municipalities of the province were bannered on the street side showcasing the towns assets and resources. Replicas of the Senior Sto. Niño were also built on the corners of Jones Avenue and Fuente street. I was lucky enough to witness the opening of the weeklong celebration at the Fuente plaza headed by their acting mayor who is the city’s vice mayor. The activity was graced with different dance troupe showing the Sinulog dance festival and a firework display highlighted the circle as it formally opens the event. The Search of Ms. Cebu 2009 pageant night follows after the affair which introduces the young lovely contestants and a band fest wakes the whole evening.

See you more on this Sinulog Festival Celebration. Pit Señor!!!

25th Silver Anniversary

2009-01-09T09:15:00.001+08:00

I’m so excited to start my first blog entry this year with a remarkable and a memorable event. Yesterday January 7, 2009 was a special day for my family and especially to my parents. Both of them have renewed the vows of matrimony as they celebrated their 25th Silver Wedding Anniversary.

I am happy for they have reached 25 fruitful years of marriage. I know many couple will reach same years being together with the ups and downs but only few may have the chance to celebrate the silver chapter of their married life. I never expect that this celebration will come into realization thinking for some constraints, but my parent as well as my siblings makes it to a point to make things happen on their very special day. I also know that everything is worth to be thankful and celebrated.

The renewal of their matrimony took place in Lindaville Church, Tagbilaran City at around 2:30 in the afternoon. The small entourage was all ready from the sponsors down to the bride and groom. Though it was not really that same of what a wedding ceremony is, since some parts of it were skipped and unlike their first marriage there were no flower girls, ring bearer, best man nor a maid of honor was present, it was just me, my other three brothers and sister completes the whole entourage. There were only less people who attend the fact that it is a working day, it was just simple family celebration. I have witnessed a lot of weddings but that was my first time to be one of those who marched on the isle and it was on my parents wedding so this was another thing I will remember.

A thanksgiving dinner party was held at our residence right after the ceremony. Flocks of people came, relatives, friends and neighbors added th e fun of the event. A short program was also done to give chance to the couple to do a little speech. My parents narrated their 25 years of their married life. It was truly inspirational one that makes me proud of them, and ever since I was really proud and grateful to have them as our parents. A video presentation was shown on how their love story started and all they have been through the years until the present time. There is nothing more I can ask for them, I am much thankful and blessed to have them as my family and them being my parents, they showed us love, they taught us responsibility and understanding and more to that they leave us values and manners. Raising five children is not easy in the peak of their respective careers which they excel, it only shows how they balance being a career parents and how they are bound together for love. My wish and prayer to them is that they may have another 25 years or more to cherish looking forward to golden anniversary and to my family as well that may we will always be united in love.

The thanksgiving celebration is also a tribute to my brother who passed his licensure examination for Electronics Communication Engineer last 2007 (better late than never) and to all the blessing that the Creator have endowed to us.

Cheers to all!
Ian Mark

a year ender entry

2008-12-30T23:55:00.002+08:00

I never thought I could write another entry again after the hectic and limited time I have before new year and its only hours to count soon it will be New Year’s eve. On my last two entries unfortunately I was not able to give details for some highlights that happened to me this year which I promised to sum up on my previous post I made right after Christmas day except of course with the latest one about my island escapade, so I would like to grab this chance to write and say it all.

I may say that this year was not really the best year (none of it was I guess), but maybe this year is a better one. A lot of goodbyes, heartaches, frustrations and struggles that happened, but despite all that there were more hellos, love and hope. I believe when people you cared about leaves, there are also people who comes not to take their places but to make a new path for love and would give strength and hope in times we are to give up. I would also like to say that I am truly blessed. I have a wonderful family thought there were times we’ve been struggling but we made it to a point to cope up. I got a good job might as well stable, I got great friends and lastly I have worthwhile experiences.

This year I have met lots of people. There were those strangers who takes part for new learning and who somehow became best buds, there were those also who were long known friends who just made roles on adding colors to my life and love. There were also who were there from the start that till now never gone out and there were some who came back and give life a spark again. Though some didn’t stay for so long, and others were just passerby and there are who leaves for good, I am still thankful to know them and been a part of my journey. I am also happy that this year I’ve been to places. I always make it to a point to go to places I have never been before every year. I was also able to buy stuffs and gadgets from my own earnings. I maybe have done lots of things this year but none of it I had regrets.

My career as working bachelor is doing fine, I just turned a year this month. My love life at the moment is okay in a red-blush but yet complicated, whatever it is what matter is I am happy. And to myself maybe this time I learned more to become stable in all aspects. All I wish for next year is more savings, looking forward to work for another year in my maiden company, a blooming love life, more places to go, more people to meet, more hang outs with friends, good health to myself and family and a lot more of experiences. Whatever lies for me next year, I just have to live with it. I just pray for a more fun exciting fruitful year next year. I guess that is all that are installed for me this year and I am hoping that you may be a part of my next year. So farewell 2008… hello 2009!

Happy New Year!!!
Ian Mark

Balicasag Island escapade

2008-12-30T04:25:00.001+08:00

Hi everyone!

I would like to apologize for stating on my previous entry that it might be my last post for the year, fortunately it isn’t! I could not forgive myself if I can’t share to you another wonderful experience I have days before the year ends. Besides I used the word “maybe” so I guess I have reason to write up a new one or two. Hehe (lame excuse).

Last Saturday evening was supposedly be our high school reunion or shall I say an overnight gathering of long old fellas than saying it is a reunion because it wasn’t (whatever!). The said get-together turned out to be hopeless-pathetic assembly after some uncertainties of plans and people whom I don’t want to mention. Of more or less 20 who confirmed there were only four of us present on the meeting place and a four hours of wait only shows that it wouldn’t push thru and it totally pissed me off. In order to ease our temper, we just make you use of the time bonding in a nearby KTV bar and decided not to go if ever they will pursue. After a couple of hours have past people came one by one telling that we must go on with the plan. I can’t blame for the other two who haven’t change their mind not going. A long hours of wait isn’t a joke and when everything seems so unsure I don’t think anything can ever change their decision. The atmosphere turns bad, I couldn’t stop myself to burst out my temper. I said what I have to say and I know that what I say had a point I walked out to coffee shop and bought myself a mocha jelly mint frappuccino to calm down myself.(wow!)

To cut the story short after a long discussion we drove down to the beach and when luck is not on your side expect for the worst. On our way, we got a flat tire in the middle of the night, we knocked on a vulcanizing shop but unfortunately no one answered well again it’s almost midnight they already been dreaming. Thanks heaven we are not really that unlucky enough. So when we arrived we played card games, a little booze and more chit chats. Early morning, we drove again to another resort to take an early morning bath but the plan became an island escapade.

Sunday morning at the Alona Beach Resort when we are about to take bath on the beach a group of bangkeros came to us and made a good deal for an island hopping and underwater snorkeling. We all the agreed. The supposed to be well-planned reunion that turns to a hopeless pathetic gathering became an unplanned fun and exciting escapade (I never imagined the twist). We sailed about 45 minutes to an island across the white sand beach lines of Alona and explore the beauty of the underwater features of Balicasag Island. The trip, the pay, the wait and everything that happened the other night was worth it upon seeing the wonderful scenario under the sea. I almost forgot everything that happened the night before. I really had much fun and enjoyed the island trip. It was a long time plan for all of us to have a trip on Balicasag Island, but we all didn’t expect that it will happen on that day. We spent most of the time swimming, taking pictures, strolling by the sea side and snorkeling seeing different variety of fishes and corals. It was nice – it was another unexpected experience. I don’t know if it was luck, or maybe by fate that doesn’t want to spoil my whole weekend. We went home by lunch and a heavy rain poured making us wet. As I got home I was dropped dead on my bed. I just realize one thing - that sometimes great things happen when you least expect. Plan but never expect. I am just thankful that the last weekend of the year that I thought would be the worst turns to be a great weekend to be remembered .

Ian Mark

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-27T05:49:00.001+08:00

Hi! I want to greet everyone a happy yuletide season. I promised myself to write an entry before this month ends and maybe my last one for this year. And since there are only a few more days to go before new year I guess have to summed up everything that happened to me this year. Though I have lots of entries pending unfinished and unpublished maybe I could have it done early next year.

But first of all, I wanted to share how I celebrated my Christmas day I was so happy that I spent it with my family, there was a big possibility that I might have spent it in our office for the kind and nature of the work I have if only our big bosses did not approved a break on the eve. Like last year, me and my friends have our Christmas tradition, where we went house hopping the night before Christmas and on the Christmas eve, me and my family celebrated it happily, we all joined together for the Noche Buena. It was quite different than before, our family have grown bigger this time after some of my cousins moved in and now that me and my brother have work we shared also some of our little blessings to them.

Yesterday 12-25-08, I treated myself - for I think I deserve to unwind and give myself a break (I always do). I watched two official films entries of the annual MMFF (Metro Manila Film Festival) “Baler” and “Ang Tanging Ina Nyong Lahat” I just hope I can make a blog for my movie review on the two films. I also spent most of the day with some of my high school friends. After everything I went home late, I was so thankful to have a merry Christmas but there was something I regret from that I could have spend more time with someone.

people always leave

2008-12-17T04:35:00.001+08:00

“People always leave” is the only line that stuck on my mind from the American drama TV series One Tree Hill. It was when Peyton Sawyer wrote these words on a piece of paper after she realizes that most people she loved, cared about and those that are close to her just leave and were gone. And that she felt she’s been left out.

People come and go into our life. People who were there most of the time and those who we met by chance. We may have met some and know them unexpectedly and they may leave us unexpected as well. These people might have changed us, gives inspiration or directions in our lives and that as much as possible we don’t want to lose them. And by the time when they are so close to us, is the time they were pulled far away. But then we need to face a fact that we can only hold on for someone just for a moment, like some things may last forever but no one stays forever. We can’t have them for long and that’s one of the sad reality. It is been all up to us to make the times with them worthwhile.

So never stop yourself in saying how much you love a person and show them how much you really cared. If you wanted to do something for them, then do it. You should have at least spend and lend some time for them. When time comes that you will be on separate ways at least you both hold on for one thing – good memories.

It is sad to see people leave and it is hard when especially you just know they were leaving . But what hurts more is when they leave without giving you any reason or haven’t given a chance for you to say a word or goodbyes . It is like that you were left alone hanging for the moment and trying to figure out everything. I know that the basic question asked is “why”. They say they are only two reason why a person has to leave, either if one stay things might get so complicated or if one leaves things may be better. And until know it is the same question I have been asking still unanswered. Why they have to leave? Why she or he has to leave? Or maybe why I have to leave?

a year after

2008-12-04T04:26:00.004+08:00

Days were so fast yet the time runs so slow. As I was counting the days before the year end, I was thinking about myself on where I have gone so far with my life. I then realized that I’ve been working already for a year. Today, to be exact is my one year anniversary as a working individual (cheers to me). I could still remember those days from my first and final job interviews, from the job fair in which I quit in the middle of the action , to the company to company job search where I need to compose myself, be ready and be confident, and lastly on how excited I am on my first day of work . I really could not forget those times - it’s a really a fun learning experience.

As I was looking back, I also thought of what I have gained and have done for almost a year of work. Aside from gaining 5 lbs this year, I have gained lot of experience and fond memories from my work and from my working mates. What I am proud about is that I am already earning and that I am able to buy stuffs for myself and share whatever I have to my family. And more to that I am happy to say that I learned to become independent as well as to play with life’s fate. I know now how is it to be a careered person, it’s fun, exciting and yet difficult.

I am very much thankful for having a good job in my mother company. I have colleagues that are nice to work with, I have a great boss, a cool working environment that has a friendly atmosphere and with regard to workloads I find it challenging and uncomplicated compared to others. And lastly everyone is welcomed and treated as a family. I may have said some imperfections with the company but here I learned to be motivated, more responsible, and be patient enough and still I say it’s really great working here. I can’t explain how my year is and it’s too early to tell, since a lot of things happened that I wish I could state it one by one. All I can say is that though it might not be the best, all I know is I am blessed and that makes me feel better and makes it a good one if ever. For now, I am just praying for my work that I will not lose interest and to continue to dedicate myself into it. I am looking forward to work for another year or more so wish me luck!

dear heart

2008-11-06T03:59:00.002+08:00

I don’t know what I am actually feeling at this very moment and ever since I don’t have any clue on what do I really feel. Let’s put it this way, when I love, I love and I give the love I wanted to be loved but of course I don’t expect any in return that makes it selfless and like everyone else when you love your hoping for a chance to be loved back.

Let me sum up everything by a couple of lines of a message I got that in a way could explain to what I wanted to impart. “There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and beautiful and we just find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person. This feeling soon become a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions. The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than just a friendship.” This happens to me many times ending up to a teary heart just the same thing that happened again for the past months. I’m tired of thinking why it couldn’t be and that makes me become frustrated. The lines speaks a lot and yet simple to understand. I know that I am not just the only one who feels this way. It brought me some realizations that sometimes we just need to admit that this is a sad reality and learn to accept without being bitter or sorry for ourselves. And maybe they are right that if you lose in love, that doesn’t mean that you failed in love. And that if you lose someone today, someone better is coming tomorrow just pray it won’t happen repeatedly.

What is important is that I love and if they haven’t acknowledge it then maybe they don’t deserve such love. I’m still hoping and waiting till time comes this heart will be tired and after all everything will fade as well as the pain it somehow brings.

So tell me now Mr. Heart, tell me what should I do because I don’t really know.

>bleeding love

not another you

2008-10-24T00:05:00.002+08:00

You came into my life unexpected
Everything was hard and complicated
You’re near but still so far,
Out of reach but worth a try.

You stayed – but on somebody’s arm
yet its fine, for I know there’s you I can turn to
You stand holding someone’s hand
It’s alright, for at least your nearby my side.

You saw but never believed
You cared but never showed
You felt but you never said
Tell me how will I know if you feel same way too.

You talked about love,
But can never love back.
You say have hope,
But leaves my hearts on despair.

Though it hurt much and I am sad,
I’m happy and was glad for once there was you in my life,
still I am on pain thinking,
that the two of us can never really be.

Maybe it was wrong
in waiting for this long,
maybe I’ve been stupid in keeping you
or a mistake in loving you.
And so I promise not to fell again for someone like you.

Not another you.

soliditarious

2008-10-22T22:27:00.001+08:00

All alone in the middle of nowhere,
rain fell like pins with frosty breeze.
In the cold night I couldn’t breathe
chilling to death hoping to cease.

I felt numb and rattling in fears
I hid myself from bloody tears,
Knowing that nobody cares,
in a life I cannot anymore bear.

Silent, in the dark corner I laid flat,
taking all those pains for years I got
counting on minutes ‘til they pass
for any second might be my last

My heart broke, My mind stopped
My body’s dead, My soul trapped
Everything in gray and solitude
And all of a sudden my life went black.

tutorial

2008-10-17T02:16:00.001+08:00

This past few week was a very tiring and stressful yet productive and exciting. I just started my part time job Monday last week as private Korean tutor. The first day was little bit stirring, I did review my basic English and for heaven sake I almost forgot those lessons since it was years before. I know I’m not really good in English, and I’m not an English major nor a teacher either but I just wanted to give a try. I may not be that confident but I trust myself. A lot of what "if’s" were also in my head. Everything was really blank to me, until I and Corie (my co-tutor) arrived in their condo unit late that morning. Being late on our first day was quite embarrassing, we don’t want to create a negative first impression but who cares we got a good excuse. As we reached by their doorstep, they were all been there waiting. They let us in and we immediately started the tutorial. We don’t have a formal introduction. They didn’t even bother ask our names nor ask how are we doing. We directly went on the tables and do our things.

The family have two sons and I did my tutor with the younger brother who is Baek Seung Ju (백승주).Carlo as his English name is twelve years old. He is a smart kid and little naughty, though sometimes he had a difficulty in understanding and speaking English yet his a good learner. He is cute, childish and cuddly and we easily get along. At first it was hard, so as much as possible I wanted to have a friendly atmosphere that will also give way to our cultural differences and language barrier and so it won’t sound boring and yet with restrictions and limitations. It is not just studying, we even talked about their culture, their place, his interest and more. We are in a give and take process. I tried to understand as much as he do and really takes a lot of patience. Well, thanks to his digital dictionary it was really a great help for translations.

(Me and my student during our break.)

Saturday that week, Corie and I switched places. I was now with Baek Seung Hyuk (백승혁), 15, who later changed his English name to Brad from James. He was Carlo’s older brother. He’s more dedicated, mature and have established a good English background, so there’s no need for me to elaborate more on the basic. I focus more on his pronunciations, reading comprehensions, listening and speaking skills, spelling and getting rid of his Korean accent. Brad and I also gets along well, we talked much about interesting stuffs, more or less Filipino-Korean culture and facts. We even have lunch together that day and bonded for a couple of hours, we ate on Filipino cuisine, we played in an arcade and strolls down the mall. Brad’s father just wanted him to practice his communication skills thru conversations as a preparatory for his speech exam, so all the time we speak English. Not to say, he is also a bright kid.

As the days gone by, though it’s a job after my grave yard shift I’m getting used to the tiring routine and in way I enjoyed what I’m doing. Yet the pay is also good and I wouldn’t have taken my health as a risk if I don’t need it. This is not for good and I don’t have plans to stay long in this kind of lifestyle, just being practical in this kind of place where I am, every move cost for a penny. I admit many have changed when I started, I missed lot of things and in some ways my life’s social, and most of all my physical aspects was really been much affected but I guess it depends upon how I manage, because for now I am okay and I look into it in a positive perspective. Day by day me and my students were getting well and I also learned a lot of things from them, it is a fun learning process for both of us. Again it is not all about money, it’s a new learning experience and gaining new friends and that is what that matters.

I am happy that Brad passed his entrance exam in an exclusive international school yesterday and so I’m hoping too with Carlo. We’ll, it pays for that five long hours of study for six days a week. I am also glad that they learned something from me and for what I have taught them. It’s a content to share my own learning in a little way as well as they do to me. It is a satisfying feeling, that a dream of being a teacher somehow been fulfilled in me. An experience worth to be remembered and to be proud of.

one ride to remember

2008-10-10T03:05:00.001+08:00

The trip…

It’s been a year from now since the day we took road trip to a town fiesta in Lila, Bohol with my friends the so called “midnight rangers” on motorcycles bikes one hot Saturday morning. We drove in convoy for almost a couple of hours in a 28.5 km county road from the city. Though with the extreme heat, yet tiring we have fun and it was really a one hell of a ride!

When we reached to Matet’s hometown, it was pretty exhausting. We all went inside the bedroom and look for a corner to nestle and take a little rest. After a while we watched a seasoned anime on DVD “The Avatar” a famous cartoon series in Nickolodeon channel (I was hooked into this cartoon series, it’s really awesome!!) and right after watching a few episodes, was time for lunch, we all shared the food on the table, with mouth-watering desserts and a little booze of beer and red wine.

It was past noon when we finished lunch and find ourselves gathered again on the bed in the bedroom watching again next episodes of “the Avatar”, we even tried to remember the titles of every episode and have some game like having an exam. See! we are all really addicted to this thing! (Go Aang! Co’z I believe that Aang can save the world!) haha.. that really proves!

Late afternoon we took a leisure walk down town and explore some places. We went into the beach and take some pictures with the wonderful view with a dramatic lightings from the sunset. We also went to the church as a respect and lit a candle for our intentions and thanksgiving. We played on the playground right across the church and spent most of our time enjoying like kids till evening comes.

When we came back to the house, we all prepared for dinner. It was a full dinner, with all the food and drinks, well what do you expect form a town fiesta?! And of course it was Matet’s thanksgiving party in a way. When dinner ends and most of the people were gone, we planned to have an early trip the next day to take a bath on a spring in a neighboring town. Everyone agreed, so well all freshened up and get ready for sleep. Except of course for Luke who went home with Ghuki that night for he have things to do the following day but Ghuki came back morning the next day.(she doesn’t want to miss the fun, huh!), while Munel still trying to finish the last few episode of the Avatar. Tired from the trip and all the strolling around, all of us got a deep sleep that night.

The spring…

We woke up around 8:00 am, late than the time we planned to depart for an early spring bath.We all prepared our stuffs and then off we go. We traveled again for another extra mile about 13 km from Lila to Valencia still still on morotcycles in a pretty hot Sunday morning.

When we arrived at Badiang Spring, a little disappointment were found on our very excited faces. We’re too early and the pool was empty and was not yet ready for use. The spring was blocked from its flow while the caretakers cleaned the whole vicinity. One of them told us that we need to wait for an hour, but the wait was over as our eagerness to jump in can’t wait when the water from the spring been filled into the pool. We spent most of the morning playing and swimming like kids in the cold, fresh clean clear water as it flows down on our bodies having a soothing and relaxing feeling. It was time for lunch when we all drove home, we traveled more or less 42 km straight ahead from Badiang passing by Lila to Tagbilaran City. (wow, we traveled that far in motorcycle?! Isn’t that amazing!).
I reached home by 2pm, and like them I was dropped-dead in my bed. I believe everyone have enjoyed and have fun for that one hell of a ride. That was really a great weekend!

Next stop? Who knows? Midnight rangers takes ride for suprises! So we'll never know until we're there. :)

getting started all over again...

2008-10-01T21:21:00.001+08:00

it was two years ago when i learned about this "blog stuff". I didn't even know that this kind of thing exist in cyberspace, not until a friend of mine introduced it to me when she let me read her posted article on her blog and i have fun reading it. i only just thought of friendster, myspace and xpango and other friend networking sites. By then, I became interested in blogging. its seems like your personalized diary where you can write every thoughts, ideas, feelings and opinions. I find it as a perfect place to write my emotions about all the happenings of my life and even of course write about the people whom I have met. What's good in it is that I have choices whether to post it in public and let everyone read or simply private and let a few know. A good outlet for a working mind.

By that time I considered myslef a blogger it took me months to keep tract and update my blog, until i became busy in school and for some fun stuff and everything were forgotten. I even forgot my username, email, password and i do had a little patience retrieving them so i didn't mind nor care. I even have a blog where I have written all about my life, i mean everything even the deepest and darkest secrets i have, good thing is i forgot, bad thing is what if someone could find and read it.. (disaster!!!)

Finally this is my new blog, I started writing on this last year but for some reason something unexpected happened that i need to delete all my post leaving this empty and bare. Now, that there are lot of things that needs to be oozed out since last year, i believe its the best thing to write them down for atleast it could give some space to my over exhausted mind. then i decided to write all over again and have it shared. Some are worth writing specially those feelings or emotions that you can't show off. I guess this is the best way to escape. And this is it, I just hope I spare time for this after having a busy sched in my carier and personal endeavors.

--good luck to me--- c",)